STEP AWAY FROM THE CRUNCHY CREDIT CARD AND THE
'BID NOW' BUTTON! UH-OH, TOO LATE...
BLIMEY, LOOK at the smug, superior expression on my fissog... You see, that is the look of someone who can afford to indulge in a Singer Gazelle: the sporty posh badged Arrow-series car which was supposed to be higher up the Rootes food chain than the Hunter, but wasn’t really because that was the job of the larger-engined Vogue, a car which wasn’t quite as prestigious as the Humber Sceptre.
Deary me. Explaining the Rootes Group model strategy is a bit like getting a few kids to act out that old ‘An Understanding of Class’ from 'The Frost Report' – it’s all very befuddling. I suppose the best way to describe the badge-engineered Gazelle, is like a BMC Riley without the twin-carb effort.
As for the daft expression on my face, well, my buttocks are just the latest in a long line of renowned buttocks to grace the Gazelle’s vinyl bench seat. If you really want to make sure that someone has sat in the back of your car, you really should try telling your mates that your car’s rear seat has never been sat on. I did and it’s like watching an anarchic game of rugby with everyone piling in...
Anyway, how did I get to be lounging in the back of a 1969 Singer Gazelle, when really I should have been working on my Custard Cream Dream Triumph? Easily, I pin the fault squarely and unfairly on the lads at the Ford Heritage Collection, because it was they who seduced me with their MkII Cortina 1600 Super’s charms.
Packing spot-lamps, bullet wing mirrors and wonderfully standard skinny steels, it really is a time-warp car and I’ve been haunted by it ever since I slapped my eyes on it.
It’s just one of those cars which takes me right back to a childhood of quiet Sundays, the Winter of Discontent (sorry, the first one!) and half-day closing on Wednesdays. Those two subtle mods – mirrors and lamps – give it the feel of a lucky 17-year-old lad’s first car from the early Eighties.
If the outside was temptation personified then it’s interior was something even more powerful, because the Super and its mint interior have clearly never been separated. You used to see these ’Tinas littering street corners, but now they’ve all retired to the classic show-ground and the ones which do the circuit all seem to be either fat-wheeled 1600Es or Lotus replicas.
The odd thing is, neither of those models have the innocent, unpretentious charm of that skinny-tyred Super, so instead I went looking for a budget-priced alternative and chanced upon the Singer on Ebay.
One eight hour drive with Mr Stretton later and £350 and we were so far north east that we were practically in Denmark.
Its description was spot-on (just as well given my blind punt): only 45,000 miles, two successive elderly spinster owners and it had been kept in storage for the last 10 years. It had a damaged quarterlight after some little pikies had broken into the garage – but at least it had escaped their handiwork, unlike its stablemate, the interior of the Thirties Lagonda was totally ruined. Yes the old girl ran, but the water pump would need replacing.
Of course the bodywork is a bit frilly – the sills have gone as have the rear wheelarches and lower rear wings (luckily, I scored a pair of these at Beaulieu). The rear edges of the driver-side front wing is looking a bit lumpy-bumpy, but could be repairable. First, though, I will get it together and see what the MoT man will find.
The front numberplate needs sorting (an eight has turned itself into a three) and a NOS water pump has rectified that spooky moaning. However, not long after these photos were taken, it refused to start. So it’s looking like Lucas the Prince Of Darkness is once again trying to extract his horrible revenge...
The star attraction of the Gazelle has to be its interior and save for an iffy organ throttle pedal connection, it is eerily mint in here. Everything works, the ashtray has never been sullied by a single fag and the dashboard veneer has only got a couple of small cracks. It really is one of those cars which looks as if its fallen through a hole in time.
So at the moment my big questions regarding this Rootes rarity are: to mod or not to mod and if so, how far shall I go?
DEP-O JOB SHEET
MkII Golf Driver
Been sat outside for too long and is slowly turning green with moss and mildew. Get battery charged and see what’s going on.
MG Midget
Tired clutch linkage means it sticks in gear, usually first, which makes me really popular in traffic. Fuel pump not responding, strip and remedy.
Triumph 2500
Too much to list here! It runs, but the body needs sorting but I’ve already started collecting bits and pieces.
SC's PLEDGE: "I must get something running, otherwise I'll have to change this to a 'standing still report'. Call this a belated New Year's resolution."
